Finding the magic in Hong Kong

It was 2012 when I last visited Hong Kong, so I was excited to receive an invitation to co-steward the first ever Art of Hosting training November 21 - 24. Our calling question was How can we reconnect to our shared humanity so that we can weave a thriving future for all?

Much has changed in the intervening years, but some things remain the same, including the pace of life. Just as in many other places around the world, participants in our circle spoke about how much they longed for deeper connections, meaningful conversations and spaces where they could be authentic to how they were really feeling. Grief and exhaustion from past years was just below the surface.

In a recent conversation debriefing our experience together, one of the apprentices asked me why our "at the crossroads" moment was so magical. 

It was the afternoon of our second full day together when we offered a space for letting go and letting come. Each participant received a piece of water soluable paper and quiet reflection space. One by one they came and dropped the paper into the water, while the rest of us held space and witnessed. It became a powerful and deeply emotional moment.

I explained that this moment became possible out of a combination of the tangible and intangible that lies at the heart of hosting. As a team, we created a skillful weaving of methods -- the tangible -- that created a container strong enough to encourage trust between us and make vulnerability possible.

One of the skillsets within the Art of Hosting is the layering of methods to move at the pace of the group. When this works well, the willingness of people to stay in conversation and the tension of exploring something -- despite dissonance -- increases. 

Storytelling is also an important contributor to people feeling connected and understood. We used two different story methodologies, and this greatly enhanced the depth of listening and witnessing ability in the group. Story easily leads to the ritual moments so needed by the human psyche.

By the time we reached this point in the program, we had created a relationship field strong enough to hold the grief that is specific to this situation and underpins most of human experience these days. People were resourced to go deep together.

At the same time, there is the stance of the host -- an important intangible -- that must be present for people to trust they are well held enough that they can go deep. For others to trust, first we must be trustworthy. I'm not saying that because I was present this happened, but because I bring my years of practice, love of storytelling and ability to create heartfelt spaces, it becomes more possible.

Together we created the space where magic could arise.

In debriefing this moment I understood more fully the equation I've often quoted: "It's 40% the facilitator, 40% the participants and 20% magic." We do what we can to create the conditions where magic happens.

Just a day after our training finished the huge fires in the housing blocks began. It was beautiful to see our circle of hosts hosting each other in how they would individually and collectively respond to this tragedy.