Standing in the gap

This the third post in the TENDERNESS series

Many people have told me they feel "in the gap" right now, sure that something new is coming, but not sure exactly what comes next. One person told me they feel the energy in many associations they are connected to, which are all trying to do good work around the world, is crumbling. 

I feel in the gap too. There is a deep sea change happening -- both individually and collectively -- but I can't yet see what it will mean for me and my work, simply that I feel a sense of being unmoored and adrift.

The focus I have adopted in this time of uncertainty is to try to strengthen what i can -- heart, mind and body -- and to simply keep taking the next step I can see and and attend more deeply to what I can feel.

My inner sense tells me that when we are facing our current world dilemmas the only way out is through and relationships are key. 

A World Café colleague asks this question: "Where are the places and spaces people are longing for that appear to be absent?"

I've personally had a deep calling this year to offer spaces for being in practice together.

In May I co-hosted The Heart of Practice where we took a deep dive into the Fourfold Practice, the foundational practice pattern for the Art of Hosting. This is the missing piece for many consults and organisations I speak to -- they don't have a solid practice framework.

The beauty of something like the Fourfold Practice is that it gives me a map of the areas of potential both for myself as a practitioner and together with others. When I'm working with new colleagues, it creates a sense common ground we can immediately build on.

The elements of the Fourfold Practice

The Fourfold Practice is the foundation for hosting conversations that matter is a sea of complexity. This pattern is a holon, meaning that each part incorporates and integrates the part before it. It begins with HOST YOURSELF.

What are your personal practices that help you to stay grounded and present, no matter what happens around you? This is the first step to being a solid practitioner in life. Knowing and trusting yourself helps you be present for others.

Next comes BE HOSTED. When was the last time you were not in charge, but allowed someone to host you so you could be part of the conversation and learning? Practicing conversation is a great counterbalance to hosting others.

Then it comes to HOST & HARVEST CONVERSATIONS THAT MATTER. What conversations do you feel inspired to host? What kind of conversations do you feel called to host and why?

And then comes HOST EACH OTHER. Being part of a community of practice is a great way to sharpen your practice. Working together with others helps you stay in learning and also refine your capacities.

At the core is the mastery pattern. The two parts – Outer Practice – the attention to staying in fierce practice so it becomes part of who you are and Inner Presence – keeping a beginner’s mind so there is a fresh, open space to be surprised and learn something new, as well as developing solid inner ground so you can face whatever life throws at you – are actually parts of one practice. Together these offer a pathway for continuous learning.

For me personally, this dance of inner and outer is a focus that has offered me much meaning in my work.

During The Heart of Practice event we looked at how the Fourfold Practice can scale from the personal to the professional to the systemic.

The Art of Hosting encompasses thousands of practitioners around the world. We have no formal hierarchy, no logo, no centre. What do you call that kind of thing? We decided to name ourselves not a community or a field, but an eco-system of practitioners and participatory practices for conversation & work that matters.

For me, the Art of Hosting is an experiment in synarchy. How can a light and flexible structure partner together with self-organising to serve what the world needs right now? In practice, it is a beehive, where we all contribute to making the honey for the future generations.

I love being in the beehive. And it helps to remind me what might be possible while I'm still in the gap.

How do we be in practice together and stay committed to staying connected and in continuous learning? What are the gifts of being in inquiry together, especially in times of uncertainty? What is the tenderness needed in the gap?